WOUNDS WON’T HEAL UNTIL THEY ARE CLEANED
This story is written by a lady named Kimberly. It is something she went through after doing something she knew was wrong and didn’t know if God would ever forgive her. So, she wanted to share her victory with others going through the same dark valley. She begins by asking, “Have you ever felt as if something is broken in your life – either something within you or something in your circumstances?” If so, perhaps you did what I did, run to destructive habits, like emotional eating, as a reaction to brokenness.
I thought I could get over it, that my negative habits of self-pity could soothe my hurt feelings. It did for a little while. Even made me put my brokenness out of my mind. But it wasn’t long before something happened to cause the jagged pieces of hurt feelings and despair cut into me again.
Before I knew it, I got caught up in a destructive cycle; trying to escape that pain of brokenness to that something I hoped would make me feel whole again. But I remembered what King David prayed that described these same feelings: “I am weak and broken. I cry because of the pain in my heart.” (Psalm 38:8).
Let me tell you what I discovered so that if you are dealing with something broken in your life that keeps driving you back into unhealthy behavior, here are two Scriptures that helped me and I know they will help you. First, “The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart. And He saves those who are broken in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18). And there is: “The high and honored One Who lives forever, Whose name is Holy, says, ‘I live in the high and holy place. And I also live with those who are sorry for their sins and have turned from them and are not proud. I give new strength to the spirit of those without pride, and also to those whose hearts are sorry for their sins.’” (Isaiah 57:15)
I learned that to receive the Lord’s help for my despair, was to first recognize that I could not repair myself. I knew several people who were enslaved to destructive habits because they refuse to admit they needed help. Their pride prevented them from doing so. I didn’t want to end up like they did.
To me, it looked like they had this “golden image,” of self-sufficiency and looking strong before others while inside they are falling apart. Underneath it all, they live under the fear of being “found out.”
It dawned on me, that freedom and healing would only come when I too stopped worshipping that golden image and get real.
I agreed with the spirit within me to let God remove those destructive habits and submit my heart to Him for healing so that I could be truly whole once more. So, here’s what I prayed:
“Gracious Heavenly Father, in the compassionate name of Jesus, I am so grateful to you that You saved me from my sins! You said that sin would not have dominion over me, for I am not under law but under grace.”
“How I need your grace now so that I can walk in freedom every day. You welcome those who have a broken spirit and a broken and a contrite heart. Welcome me into your presence Lord, for I am weak and broken in my flesh. I recognize You as the One who heals the brokenhearted and binds up our wounds. I honor You as the Repairer of the Breach. Make me whole in You. Fill me with your comfort and your peace.”
“I am Your child, Your handiwork. I renounce the broken cisterns I’ve run to in my life, those worthless things that can hold no water. Instead, I turn to You in my brokenness, the Fountain of Living Waters. You promised that those who come to You will have an everlasting spring – waters that will never fail. These waters will revive me and refresh others. I believe Your word. Each day, perfect me in Your love.”
“I know it is only Your perfect love that will cast out fear. As You heal me, make me a channel of blessing so that I may share with others the healing that You have worked out in me. Thank You for saving me, Lord. Thank You for giving a new vision of my life past my pain, but a new life that is complete – one that is healthy, healed, and whole in You! In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
I knew then I needed to make a drastic change in order to live in health, healing, and wholeness, physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. The Bible gives us a prescription for change in Romans 12:2: “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
It would be nice if our mind was renewed automatically when we accept Jesus as our Savior. But it is not. We must take the initiative to cast out old, self-defeating thoughts and replace them with thoughts that are consistent with God’s word. Only then can we experience new life in Christ.