Johnny Unitas, the former great quarterback for the Baltimore Colts (1956-1972), and considered one of the premier quarterbacks ever to play professional football, was once quoted as saying, “Conceit is bragging about yourself. Confidence means you believe you can get the job done.”
One Christian psychologist I read said that some people mistakenly think that confidence is something you either have or don’t have. That is not true. Every one of us can build and grow confidence. Even if you feel insecure and lack self-confidence, it is possible to work on yourself to acquire it. You are not damaged goods. In fact, you have unlimited and unknown potential deep inside yourself. Access your inner confidence with these six techniques.
Develop Awareness of Your Soul
Your soul is absolutely secure and brimming with self-esteem. But life in this insecure world — experiences that hurt us — can conceal and disconnect you from your soul and its inherent confidence, and leave you feeling fearful and threatened in a hostile world. To access your secure soul you need to connect to the soul; to be aware of it. The deeper your awareness, the more profound your confidence will manifest. You must become confident with confidence, so to speak; confident with your own inner soul confidence. To achieve that you need to have a relationship with your soul. By communing with your soul – through study, prayer and good deeds – you can glean energy from the soul’s inherent confidence.
Change Your Routines
Sometimes when we cannot access the inner resources that lay beneath the surface, we need to scrape away the outer crusts that conceal the energy within. Psychologically this is called behavioral change: external change brings internal change. Shift your routines and this will, in turn, shift your inner moorings. Shift breeds shift. Change your habits.
Make Changes by Faith
One way to create such a shift is to have faith it is already happening – project and believe in the possibility even when you are not in the mood. To act confident even when you may not feel that way. You’re not being a liar; you are transcending how you feel and transcending your limiting beliefs, which in turn free up your inner strengths.
Need Support? Seek and You Will Find.
Peer support is also an important factor in gaining confidence. Beginning from early childhood, the support we get from our parents (and also the lack of it) directly affects our level of self-confidence. When a child is acknowledged and encouraged, assured and complimented, the child builds courage and learns to trust him/herself. As a child explores its surroundings, observe how she or he looks for affirmation from parents and adults. Even if your childhood resulted in a lack of confidence, there is always hope. Find supportive friends and mentors who can support you in making your unique contribution to the world.
Be Around Confident People
Another powerful way to behaviorally build self-confidence is to be around confident people. Confidence is contagious. Spending time with secure people will always nurture your soul’s inner confidence, just as hanging around insecure people will always feed your insecurities.
Make Other People Feel Confident
It’s a mirror image: Confidence breeds confidence; security feeds security. You usually make others feel as you are; you project what you are and you are what you project. Confident and secure people make others feel the same. Insecure people make others feel insecure. Help others feel confident, and it will come back and bring you confidence in return.
It is good to read books on how to develop confidence, but the Word of God is not silent on this subject. It begins by telling us that our confidence comes from the Lord. King David knew what it was to face troubles and trials each day, but he also knew that His God walked along by his side. He knew that God cared for him because it was God who created him. He was not the result of chance, God put him together in his mother’s womb as an intricate human being.1
That’s no doubt why the wise King Solomon advised us, that to be confident we should seek God’s will in all that we do, and He will show us which path to take.2 He then goes on to say that with the Lord being our source of confidence, He will see to it that we don’t get tripped up by every little thing in our pathway.3
And the Apostle Paul went where no preacher of the Gospel had ever gone before. He ran into obstacles that at first glance seemed impossible to get past. But instead of relying on his own talent and abilities to get him through, he states proudly that he relied on the power of the Holy Spirit. He did this so that his confidence would not rest solely human wisdom, but wisdom and power of God.4
Because of the way God gave him strength he was able to write to his young protegé Timothy and tell him to also lean on the Spirit of God for confidence because God did not send His Spirit to dwell in us to make us timid but to give us power, love, and self-discipline.5
So by knowing who we are in Christ guides us on the path He chose for us to follow. I like the way the New American Standard Bible renders the words of the writer of the Book of Hebrews: “Therefore, do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised.”6
So, as we grow in faith, our confidence in God grows. He is always there for us. He is our strength, our shield, our helper. Growing closer to God means growing more confident in our beliefs. That’s why we can tell everyone who may admire our willingness to stick with it despite the problems along the way is because the Lord is helping us we’re not panicking like others do, It what God can do for us not what opposition can do to us that counts.7
Remember, if your confidence depends solely upon some source that might fail, you will find it hard to be absolutely confident in what life brings you to handle. So why not put your confidence in someone who will never fail? That’s why the Bible tells us that God never fails anyone. He is the one who called us, and He plans to keep us both now and throughout eternity. – Dr. Robert R Seyda
1 Psalm 139:13-14
2 Proverbs 3:6
3 Ibid. 3:26
4 1 Corinthians 2:3-5
5 2 Timothy 1:7
6 Hebrews 10:35-36
7 Ibid. 13:6